In the world of marketing, one of the greatest challenges—and often the most daunting—is defining what makes your business truly different. It’s the cornerstone of any effective marketing strategy, yet it’s the question that can leave even the most experienced professionals grappling for words. Why? Because it forces us to confront the essence of our work and articulate it in a way that resonates deeply with others.

The Struggle Is Real—And That’s Okay

It’s important to acknowledge that this process is difficult for everyone. Yes, it’s the hardest part—every time. Often, we simply don’t know the answer right away, and that’s okay. This isn’t a sign of failure; it’s a sign that you’re embarking on the necessary process of discovery and client understanding.
The truth is the best answers don’t come from you alone. They come from your clients. By asking them thoughtful questions like:
• Why did you choose to work with my firm?
• What sparked you say yes?And why now?
• Why do you think our approach will work better when other efforts haven’t?
…you can begin to uncover the golden nuggets that set you apart. Sometimes, these answers won’t come easily. Clients may need encouragement to go deeper, to move beyond surface-level responses. But their words—their genuine perspective—can unlock insights you never considered.

What If There’s No Concrete Difference?

In some industries, like financial services, the differences between competitors can feel nonexistent. The products, rates, and service delivery might all look the same. When this happens, the focus shifts from what you offer to how you communicate and connect with your market. It’s about the tone, authenticity, and relatability of your message and how your brand is represented in order to stand out from the pack.

For example, take an outsiders view of your website and your competitors’ sites. Are you speaking directly to your audience’s pain points? Are you presenting your solutions in a way that feels personal and meaningful to them, or is your list of services exactly the same as your competitors’ sites? How do your prospects think about their issues and are engaging with them on their level? These nuances can make all the difference.

It’s Not About Being the Only One

Another common stumbling block is the idea that you must be the only one offering what you do. That’s rarely true, and it’s not the point. What matters is how your clients perceive your uniqueness when they “experience” your brand, through your website, social media, presentations, articles and other marketing assets. Having an external perspective is invaluable. Even if others in your field have more experience or similar solutions, your distinct background, approach, or way of connecting can make all the difference.

Avoiding Self-Sabotage

When competitors show up, it’s easy to second-guess yourself. Resist the urge to “cancel yourself.” Instead, take a deep breath, sit taller in your seat, and remember the clients you and others in your firm have helped. The feedback from your clients is your anchor. When you stay focused on the value you bring, the competition fades into the background.

The Journey to the Golden Nugget

Capturing that elusive “golden nugget” of differentiation takes time. In the meantime, focus on what you know and who you are. You’re not trying to appeal to everyone. Your business likely doesn’t need hundreds of clients to thrive. You just need to be in the right rooms, connecting with the right people, and sharing your authentic self. When that happens, it all begins to click.

A Real-World Example

Recently, I worked with a client who was struggling with his company’s positioning. His messaging wasn’t just unclear—it was actively undermining his credibility. Together, we created a positioning statement that highlighted the company’s value, supported by a new strategic marketing plan that aligned the right ways to get engaging messages to his Ideal Client markets. Within two weeks, he landed his first prospect by saying the right things to the right people in the right way. It worked because it was sincere, authentic, and client-focused, and grounded in solid, focused strategy work.

Embrace the Challenge

Defining your unique value is not a task you complete in a day. It’s an ongoing process of listening, learning, and refining. Be patient.  Keep asking the tough questions, and don’t hesitate to seek input from those who matter most: your clients. In time, you’ll uncover the insights that set you apart and allow you to connect with the people who truly need what you offer.

Remember, it’s not about being everything to everyone. It’s about being the right solution for the right people. And when you’re in the “right rooms”, it will all feel not just possible, but inevitable.